The Unexpected "No": Rebuilding After Disappointment

There's nothing more jarring than an unexpected ‘no’ that shatters a long-held dream. For me, it came after being drafted three times by the Chicago White Sox, captaining my team in the College World Series, and believing my future in baseball was secure. But then I heard the words: ‘We don’t need you anymore.’ At that moment, everything unraveled.

Hearing those words can destroy years of hard work and dedication. Suddenly, your entire path feels uncertain, and the weight of failure—of not living up to expectations—can become overwhelming. We all encounter hurdles that seem impossible to scale, and walking away from them leaves a wound that doesn’t heal easily.

Much like our dreams that seem to collapse, the biblical story of Joshua shows a man facing his own seemingly insurmountable obstacle. The walls of a heavily armored Jericho loomed large before him, an impenetrable barrier blocking the future he believed in. Jericho’s walls often represent every dashed desire and unanswered prayer we face in difficult times, making it easy to feel as though defeat is inevitable.

Nobody is immune to problems showing up on their doorstep. Some are minor and manageable, but the larger challenges are more difficult to endure.  These unbearable disappointments and vanishing dreams are real and, at times, painful. But know this: you are not alone.  

What walls are you facing? Are they towering financial burdens, health issues, relationship difficulties, or self-imposed guilt from unmet expectations?  Unfortunately, disappointments multiply like waves, becoming plentiful and sizable, especially during stormy seasons. Just when you think you’ve survived one, another surges ashore, bringing fresh pain to bear. The temporary relief of having worked through one disappointment gets overshadowed by the trepidation of what might come next. Even if you’re not battling an issue currently, you will be soon.   

What is your approach to these difficulties? Do you take them on or avoid them while looking for alternative ways or workarounds?  Breaking down walls may require an unconventional approach, but it starts with a change of heart and mind. We must confront them to conquer them, whether it appears or becomes impossible.

Rebuilding after disappointment doesn’t mean erasing the pain. It’s about finding purpose in the struggle and reclaiming your path forward. True triumph comes when you redefine success on your terms, taking control of how you respond. So, when the next wall appears in your life, will you allow it to define your story, or will you find a way to break through and rise above it?

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